


Lonely Cantaloupes

by WhoreHouseFanfics



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-06
Updated: 2017-06-06
Packaged: 2018-11-09 22:28:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11114196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhoreHouseFanfics/pseuds/WhoreHouseFanfics
Summary: Trisha x Buccaneer by Miranda of WhoreHouseFanfics





	Lonely Cantaloupes

AN: This is an AU where Trisha never died and Al was never born because he is a precious cinnamon roll and is too good for this world.

It had been a few years since Trisha’s shitty husband left her. Really, she could not be happier. The only issue is that he left her with their equally shitty son Ed, and sometimes it can get lonely. A little too lonely…  
To remedy this situation, she decided to go to the bar to find someone to satisfy her. While she stood at the bar and ordered her drink, she saw a rather large, muscular man wearing a military uniform. She was taken away immediately and decided to go and make the first move.  
“So, come here often?”   
“No, I am just here on business.” The man said gruffly. He didn’t seem too pleased.  
“What's your name big boy”  
“ Captain Buccaneer...what should I call you hot stuff?”  
“Oh,” she said in a low, sultry voice, “you can just call me mommy,” Trisha flipped her side ponytail seductively and took Buccaneer by his arm and lead him to her home. Buccaneer was excited, he had never had a mother before.   
Once the couple made it back to the house, Trisha had one request before they got down to business. “I forgot I had a shitty son,” She explained. “We are going to need to get rid of him.” Buccaneer was more than happy to take care of the job. He punched Ed right in the face and sent him flying into the moon. Some say he is still out there orbiting the Earth today.   
“Don’t talk to me or my son ever again!” Trisha shouted after him. Then they baked cookies and read a bedtime story. She bent over and gave Buccaneer a kiss on the forehead as she tucked him into bed. “You’re the best son I could ever have.” Buccaneer smiled and looked forward to his new life with his mother. And they lived happily ever after.


End file.
